Half Full
by Of Quirky Excellence
Summary: As children growing up in the Circle of Magi, Jowan always told Maeve Amell that the glass was half full, not half empty. Years later, after the tables have turned, and Maeve, despite her youth and emotional tendencies, is destined to save Ferelden, Maeve discovers Jowan, broken and alone, and reminds him why she was so fond of him to start. Amell/Jowan, will feature Surana later.
1. Nightmares and the Miracle Urn

**Half Full**

**by Of Quirky Excellence**

Maeve Amell tossed and turned in her bedroll restlessly. It had been a week since the First Enchanter and several other Circle mages who were lucky enough to have survived the event of Uldred's possession had conducted a ritual to free Connor from the demon's grasp. The Grey warden had persuaded Irving to allow Jowan to be the one to enter the Fade and kill the demon. He had been successful, and the boy was freed from the demon, but of course the guards had whisked Jowan away and back down to the Arl's dungeons as soon as he awoke, and Maeve hadn't gotten a chance to speak to her former best friend. This caused her to be frequently depressed and anxious. Alistair had tried to speak to her a few times about it, but she had only snapped at him and treated him coldly.

The Grey Wardens were on their way back to Redcliffe with the urn of Sacred Ashes. Maeve had seen an apparition of Jowan in the gauntlet and he-no, _it, _had given her an amulet with the symbol of the Chantry on the front. but on the back, there was a shiny mirror, but instead of her own reflection, when she looked into it very deeply, she could, just for a moment at a time, see a glimpse of Jowan's face, smiling and encouraging her. She always wore this amulet of Reflection, and it was always under her robes, close to her heart.

Leliana woke her up at dawn. Maeve had tears in her eyes. "Maeve, you've been crying! What's wrong, cherie?" asked the bard.

The Warden, whose ginger colored hair was just a shade darker than Leliana's and blue eyes shone brightly in the moonlight that crept through the tent's door, sat up and sniffled. She brushed a few tears away with the back of her hand.

"I had a dream Jowan was made Tranquil…it's the third time this week." she cried.

"Oh, ma Cherie!" Leliana hugged the Grey Warden and Maeve cried into the other redhead's shoulder. Alistair walked into the tent after a few moments. He looked silently at the two women, one of which was sobbing softly into the shoulder of the other.

"As much as I hate to…interrupt," he said. "We should really be heading back to Redcliffe. We're only a few hours away."

Maeve looked up and sniffled. "Give me five minutes and I'll be out." she spoke softly.

His expression softened a little bit and he nodded. "I'll be waiting with the others. We've packed up the campsite and we're ready to go."

Leliana and Maeve waited for the former Templar to take his leave and then they got fully dressed in their armor and robes. Before heading out, Leliana asked, "Do you want to talk about Jowan?"

"Why?" replied Maeve sharply. "Talk does nothing. She placed her magical staff in its usual spot, strapped to the back of her mage robes.

"I just thought you might like to…the two of you were so close…" Leliana trailed off.

"_Were?!" _Maeve raised her voice a little more than she'd intended. "We _were_ inseparable, we were like two souls joined to one! I…I love him." Then she started to cry again as the truth came out at long last, this time more loudly, showing her true distress.

"Oh, Maeve…" the bard went to put a hand on the mage's shoulder to console her.

"_I've always loved him!"_ Maeve cried. "And now we'll never have a chance…he will be dead, _or worse_, he'll be Tranquil, and there's nothing in the world I can do to save him!" Then she lowered her voice. "If he is taken from me I swear I shall never love again."

Leliana sighed and hugged the younger girl again. "He deserves your love, Maeve. And he deserves a chance to make his life right in the eyes of the Maker."

Maeve sniffled and nodded slightly. "But what can I do? Jowan is doomed by the Chantry, condemned by the Templars, if the arl's men don't kill him first, and who knows what in the eyes of the Maker!"

Leliana paused, deep in thought. "Wait, couldn't you make him a Grey Warden?"

"You mean conscript him? Do you think Arl Eamon would even allow it? I know Alistair would never forgive me." Maeve said softly.

"Well, Arl Eamon _has_ to allow it. The Grey Wardens can conscript anyone, can't they? Even a king or the Chantry could not deny them the Right of Conscription, correct?" Asked Leliana.

"I…suppose you're right!" Maeve said, but then she went pale, a look of dread appearing on her face. "But I don't want to put Jowan through the Joining! It's agonizingly painful even if you survive, and the Nightmares are something I wouldn't wish on anyone!"

Leliana sighed. "I see where you're coming from, but in case the Arl refuses to let him go, I wouldn't eliminate the Right of Conscription as a last resort. It's better than being made Tranquil, no?"

"I suppose it is." Maeve concluded. She wiped away the last of her tears and they moved outside. Her Mabari, Mouse, named after the demon she'd met in the Fade, greeted her by trotting up and nuzzling her arm. Alistair and Sten packed up their tent and belongings.

Then the Wardens led their companions along the way towards Redcliffe castle. It was about a three hour journey to the castle. When the group arrived, Bann Teagan was waiting with Isolde and Connor in the main hall. Everything sort of went by in a blur as Alistair told the handsome Bann that they had the Ashes. Then they walked up the stairs. Leliana and Morrigan walked behind Maeve and Alistair ahead, with Teagan and Isolde, who held the hand of young Connor, anxiously as they all made their way to the Arl's bedroom which was up several long flights of stairs.

There were a few Circle Mages waiting for them when they reached the door to the Arl's bedroom. Teagan and Isolde entered the room, followed by everyone else, including the four mages from the circle. Maeve did not bother to look at their faces to see if she recognized any of them from her years as a Circle apprentice. She had been a talented apprentice, and she and another girl, Fen'Asha Surana, an elven apprentice, had been Irving's star could teach them anything, except how to get along with each other. The one link between them had been Jowan, who had been a good friend to both of them, and often kept the peace between them. Fen'Asha had betrayed them, however, and informed Irving of their plan to destroy Jowan's phylactery and run away, thus causing Maeve to hate Surana even more.

There were so many emotions rushing through Amell's head as they revived the Arl. When he began to stir, all eyes were on him, even the sea-blue eyes of the red-haired Grey Warden. The formerly comatose nobleman would be deciding the fate of the man she loved, and she was not eager to conscript Jowan unless she absolutely had no choice. She watched in bitter silence as Isolde fussed over her husband and she got a pit in her stomach. Why was this _sniveling, heartless shrew _allowed to be with the man she loved, even though she was nearly as responsible for his illness as Jowan was?

Maeve frowned at the pair and turned away. Her priorities, she knew, were to save Ferelden and end the Blight, but it was hardly fair. She was eighteen years old, had barely been out of the Tower a few months and she had far too many other things-normal, eighteen-year-old girl things, to worry about. She was hardly world-saving material.

The others didn't really notice as she withdrew from the group and she slunk off, out of the Arl's room and down the flights of stairs the way they came. The troubled Warden made her way past guards and servants on the first floor, then she entered the final, gloomy stair well that led to the dungeon. Attempting to slip past a guard who appeared to be sleeping on the job, she nearly tripped over the poor idiot's boots.

"You blasted abomination!" she cried as she caught herself on a chain hanging from the wall of the dungeon's corridor. She'd only said this because it was common slang to call somebody an abomination. It was the most offending word she could think of at that very moment. She immediately regretted her choice of words as she heard a startled gasp and the shuffling of exhausted feet and a chain coming from a cell.

_His cell._


	2. Bittersweet Reunion

**Half Full**

**Chapter 2**

**By Of Quirky Excellence**

"Miss, you shouldn't be down here…wait, I know you…you're the Grey Warden, yes?" the guard questioned her sleepily, sounding slightly drunk as well.

"Yes, and you will let me see the prisoner or else the Arl will hear of your carelessness." Maeve said fiercely.

"You know the mage, I take it?" he asked, straightening up his posture quickly in his chair.

"Not that it is _any_ of your business, but yes. Let me speak to him, bring me some food to give to him and your job will be in no danger from me." Maeve instructed.

"I cannot let you in his cell-"the guard was cut off by Maeve's sharp, crisp tone.

"You will do as I have asked! He cannot escape and he will not dare attack me." she snapped.

"Right…" The guard looked tired still, and sounded defeated. He stood up and led her around the corner and Maeve rushed to the bars. It was so dark, she could only see Jowan's grey eyes glistening in the dark. He came closer, as close as the chain attached to his right ankle would allow and stepped into the light of the torch outside the cell.

"Maeve?" he said softly. "Maeve, what are you doing down here? You shouldn't have come. Don't you have a world to save?"

He staggered a little against the chain and leaned on the bars of the cell for support, and she clasped her hands over his, and the raven-haired mage's eyes widened. startled by her sudden movement.

"One person at a time," she smiled slightly, a sad look came over her bright blue eyes as she took in the battered and broken man before her.

"You cannot save me, Maeve. You're a better person, and a better mage, than I could ever hope to be…and I have been a lousy friend to you."

The guard unlocked the cell. When the door opened, Maeve stepped in. the guard left to get the food, closing and locking the door behind him.

Jowan's words caught Maeve off guard. The tables had turned and now she felt like the lousy friend. He spoke so lowly of himself. Where was his will to live? She began to panic a little. What if he didn't even want her to help him? Was he accepting the grim fate that was surely ahead of him?

She reached for his shoulder with one hand. He flinched and his face looked pained and ghostly pale. "Oh, Jowan!" she started to cry and then threw her arms around him in a tight embrace. He accepted her weakly. the former apprentice was tired and sickly from his long stay in the Arl's dungeon.

"I'm sorry." he said simply and sadly.

Her tears started to trickle down onto his shoulder, staining what was left of his blue and purple apprentice robes. Then she pulled away slightly, looking upon him with sorrow, and she shook her head.

"No, Jowan. No, I won't let them hurt you anymore." she replied.

"Nobody is hurting me now," Jowan replied. Although it was true, (nobody had laid a malicious hand on the mage since Maeve's initial arrival, by her own request,) the damage was already done. He had many blood stains on his torn robes, dirt and bruises on his face, and a very distrustful disposition. Nobody had hurt him since he'd been allowed to enter the Fade, but no attention had been given to the wounds he bore either.

"And they won't ever again!" she said. She let him go and sat down. Slowly and painfully he joined her on the cold, hard floor. There wasn't even a pile of hay for the imprisoned mage to sleep on.

"You know what they'll do…" he trailed off, dread and sorrow in his soft-spoken voice. "_They will make me Tranquil, _or if I'm lucky, the Arl will have _some _mercy and I will be executed."

Maeve shook her head. "Not of I have anything to say about it, Jowan. I'll find a way to right all the wrongs life has done on you, I promise."

He took her hand, surprising her a little this time, and squeezed it tenderly. "I screwed up, Maeve. You shouldn't be the one to suffer as I can see you are. It's something I brought on myself, with the secrecy, the blood magic! You can't blame yourself. Let it be me, let me pay for my crimes!"

"You shouldn't have to…" she answered. "You made some mistakes, Jowan. Some people are never going to forgive you, _but I will," _Maeve squeezed Jowan's hand tighter. "Because…I care for you, Jowan. More than you'll ever know. If they do kill you…one way or another, I can never forgive myself."

He looked rather confused now. "But _why?_ Why, Maeve? There are so many other people in this world, and you'll get to meet them all! You'll get to be free and see the world and-"

"And it's all because of you!" she cried. "If it weren't for you, Jowan, I'd still be stuck in that dingy old Tower! You saved me from that life! As you used to tell me, the glass is half full, not half empty! Remember?"

"I…I never thought of it that way. I used to say that about social situations at the Tower, Maeve…" He looked deep in thought.

"It's a beautiful philosophy. You gave that to me, Jowan! You've given me so much!" she said, sniffling.

"And you've given me more than I could ever ask for; you've been a dear, dear friend, better than I ever deserved." he replied as he slowly reached his hand up to wipe away some of the fountain of tears on her face.

They were interrupted by a familiar voice, softly addressing Maeve.

"I thought I might find you here," said the Orlesian bard with a sad tone of voice. "The Arl wants to see you. _Both of you."_


	3. Conscription

**Half Full: Chapter 3**

**By Of Quirky Excellence **

**A.k.a LyriumGhost18**

Jowan went even paler than before. A guardsman appeared at Leliana's side, the same one Maeve had caught sleeping on the job. He held a tray with bread, a thin strip of ham and a glass of water on it.

"You have five minutes, then you'd best head up to the hall and I will take the mage upstairs to have his fate decided." The guard said. He opened the door to the cell and handed the tray to Maeve. She nodded her thanks and he stepped back, giving the two mages some space.

Maeve turned to face Jowan and passed the tray to him. She finally looked her old friend in the eyes and he smiled slightly, but still with a sad glimmer in his grey eyes. He ate quickly, knowing full well the meager helpings could be his last meal. Once he finished chugging the water from the cup he put the tray on the floor.

"I want you to promise me something, Maeve." He said softly. He knew Leliana and the guard were waiting outside, and that the Arl wouldn't wait forever.

"Jowan…I-" he cut her off abruptly.

"No matter what happens to me, I want you to know that you have changed my life for the better and you're destined to do great things. I couldn't be more proud to have known you. But promise me you won't remember me forever as this broken…sorry excuse for a man here…" He began to choke up on his words, realizing that this could well be the last time the two mages would be permitted to speak to or see each other again. Sniffling a little, he continued. "You'll remember me as the man I was, the one who told you the glass was half full…"

"Jowan, I'll make this right, somehow. That's all I can promise. I know I owe you that much…" she softly, but with a hint of fierceness.

Without another word, the raven-haired mage threw his arms around the last person in Thedas who valued his life, and embraced her tightly as they began to sob into each other's shoulders.

The guard entered the cell and saw the two mages this way, and he didn't have the heart to tear them apart, so he looked to Leliana for help.

"Would you please walk the Warden up to the main hall, my lady?" he asked softly.

"Yes, just give me a moment." She replied. So she went in and tapped Maeve gently on the shoulder. "Come, ma Cherie. I'll walk with you, all right?"

Maeve let go of Jowan reluctantly and her eyes did not leave his face. "It'll be all right, Jowan, I promise…" she said softly as Leliana took her by the arm and then they left the dungeons. They walked up the stairs and down a few corridors until they reached the main hall.

The Arl, his wife, and Bann Teagan were waiting for them along with Alistair and Morrigan. "Warden," Arl Eamon began. "I understand you are responsible for the salvation of my castle, my village, and my family. I owe you a great deal."

Maeve nodded solemnly, and she wiped a few tears away.

"Young lady, I also understand you've been troubling yourself about the mage, my son's tutor. He still lives, I have been told." Eamon looked around the room, and Teagan nodded, noticing that Maeve had been crying and was at a loss for words.

So Teagan spoke up. "He was imprisoned in the dungeons, brother. The guards should be bringing him up now."

The Arl nodded. "Good. We shall pass judgment on the mage now, then." Just as the bearded lord spoke, the guard led Jowan into the large room. The mage was squinting, as if the light pained his eyes, and his hands were bound in chains. He looked even worse off now that the room wasn't dark. He was bruised, beaten and his torn robes were stained with blood, of which Maeve quickly identified the source. There was a large gash in the side of his lower torso that looked very painful, even if it wasn't incredibly serious.

"Bring him forward." The Arl instructed. "I wish to see the boy who has caused us all so much trouble."

The guard obeyed, and Jowan looked nobody in the eyes.

"Jowan. What you have done is not in question. You tried to assassinate me and set into motion a series of events that nearly destroyed everything I cherish. What have you to say in your own defense?"

Jowan opened his mouth but no words came out at first. Isolde, Teagan and Eamon all strained to hear the black-haired mage's statement. "…Nothing, my lord. Only to say that I am sorry. I excpect no mercy for what I have done."

Maeve's heart sank when she heard him. "I see. Grey Warden, you knew Jowan before all this began, or so I am told. I presume you have something to say on his behalf?" the Arl asked.

Maeve cleared her throat and looked from Jowan's face to the Arl's.

"Yes. Yes I do." She paused, running a trembling hand through her chestnut colored hair, and creating a moment of quiet tension. Alistair looked at her and sighed loudly. "Jowan was an apprentice alongside me at the Circle Tower. We grew up together, did everything together. We studied together, talked, laughed, and cried…You cannot just execute him like you're putting down a rabid dog. He was, and deep down, still is, a good man and a friend." Then she bowed her head slightly. She spoke with passion and emotion, silently praying that her words would sway the Arl. But her words weren't the only ones Eamon would hear, and even Maeve was surprised when Leliana spoke up.

"He also was the one who entered the Fade to save young Conner and killed the demon." The bard said. The Arl raised an eyebrow.

"He…he did?" the Arl looked to Isolde and Teagan. Isolde frowned and replied quickly.

"I didn't tell you, because I didn't think it mattered. He did a terrible thing."

Maeve's blood boiled when Isolde spoke. "Of course it matters! I sent Jowan to help Conner so he could have a chance to do the right thing and redeem himself! And you would still condemn him." She phrased the last sentence angrily and coldly.

"He's still a blood mage, and an apostate!" Alistair interrupted. Maeve looked at him for a moment, glaring daggers at the former Templar, but he shrugged. "It's the truth, Maeve. We can't forget what he is."

Maeve huffed and looked back at the arl. "With respect, my lord, we are passing judgment on him for his crimes here, not against the Chantry." She reasoned.

"I see." Eamon eyed Jowan, scratching his beard. "But as the injured party, my ability to seek the merciful path is…strained." He paused, looking at Maeve with pity in his aged face.

"Jowan, I hereby transfer the decision of your fate to the hands of the Chantry. May the Maker show you the mercy we could not."

Jowan went pale and then stuttered softly. "I…thank you, my lord."

"What? No! Jowan, why did you thank him?! He just signed your death warrant!" she cried, losing any composure she'd been able to gather. Her thin body was trembling now, with such a mix of emotions she could not describe how she felt.

Jowan half-coughed, half-sobbed and the guardsman had to steady him and hold his arm tightly. "I'm sorry Maeve." He said weakly.

"Not as sorry as I am, Jowan! I have failed you!" Maeve broke past her companions and ran to him, hugging him tightly. He was almost too weak to stay on his feet. With the guard still clinging to him and his hands in shackles, Jowan leaned on Maeve for support. They sobbed into each other's shoulders again for a moment and once Maeve got herself together again, she turned her head, not letting go of Jowan for fear the guard would take him away. She looked at the Arl, who looked bewildered along with his brother, and Isolde, who looked more disgusted than ever now.

The Arl sighed. "I am sorry, Grey Warden, and I do this with a heavy heart, but-"

"If your heart is heavy, I can't imagine what mine is!" Maeve cried. "This means you leave me no choice." She calmed down a tiny bit and loosened her grip on Jowan, but still didn't let go.

"I hereby invoke the Right of Conscription. Any wrongdoing this mage commits, from this moment forward, is my responsibility." She said, a spirited glimmer in her sea blue eyes.

Alistair's jaw all but hit the ground. "_What?"_

"You heard me, Alistair. He won't be using bad spells on my watch." She replied.

The Arl sighed again. "Are…you certain, Grey Warden?" he asked.

"Absolutely." She nodded, finally letting go of Jowan and taking a place standing next to him.

"He is a maleificar! The Chantry will still want him captured!" Teagan said, getting over the initial shock of what was going on.

"Can she even do this?" Isolde asked, bitterly.

"I just did. Let the Chantry try and hunt him. I dare them to lay a hand on him." Maeve said fiercely. "I can deal with the Chantry, if you release him into my custody now."

"I suppose there is not changing your mind, Warden." Then the Arl raised his voice slightly. "Jowan, you are hereby pardoned for your crimes against Redcliffe, but I do suggest you keep things quiet for as long as you are here."

Jowan relaxed slightly and the guard released his grip on the young mage's arm. "Thank you! I will never forget your mercy, my lord!" he said softly but with more life in his eyes, and more hope than ever before.

The Arl noded. "Very well, but don't make me regret this decision."

Jowan looked Eamon in the eyes for the first time. "I won't. I swear to you. Someday, somehow, I will repay you, my lord."

Eamon said nothing more to Jowan but looked significantly surprised.

"Please," the Warden said, turning to Jowan's guard. "The key." The guard took a single key from the ring on his belt and handed it to her with a nod. She then took Jowan's calloused hands in hers for a moment with relief in her soft features, then she unbound his hands, dropped the chains to the ground, and threw her arms around him.

He hugged her back weakly and the guard stepped back. Then Jowan went pale as a ghost and his feeble body collapsed into her arms.

"Oh…Jowan!" Maeve gasped. Leliana was the only one who rushed to help the Warden. Jowan was out cold by the time the bard got there to help support the weight of the unconscious mage.

"The poor fellow…We should take him to a place where he can rest." She put a finger to his throat, just to be sure. "He's got a pulse. I just think this was all too much for him."

Maeve glared at Isolde, and for the first time the Warden had seen, the Orlesian noblewoman looked slightly ashamed. "Just…take him away." Isolde commanded.

Maeve nodded, her eyes narrowing. "After the damage your men did to him, I'm sure his wish is to be out of here as well."

Isolde frowned. "You have some nerve, Grey Warden!"

"She's right, though. The boy was clearly tortured." Leliana said coldly as she helped sling Jowan's left arm over her shoulder while Maeve did the same with his right.

"Like the demon tortured my family." Isolde retorted.

"Need I remind you that Jowan did not summon the demon, he killed it! And you're the only one who could have prevented all this!" Maeve fumed.

Isolde gasped at the accusation, but Alistair stepped in before any more feathers could be ruffled. "Enough, ladies! Maeve, if you are ready, we should not overstay our welcome!"


	4. Not Broken, Just Bent

Half Full Chapter 4

By Of Quirky Excellence aka LyriumGhost18

So the Warden and the bard carried the injured mage out of the castle. He was still unconscious when they reached the campsite, outside the village. The others had set up camp already.

"Alistair, go get Sten, you two prepare a tent and a bedroll for Jowan. Quickly!" Maeve urged.

Alistair sighed. "I cannot believe I am doing this!" he moaned.

But he did as he was told, and he and Sten quickly set up a small tent and put a bedroll in it. Maeve and Leliana laid Jowan down on top of the blankets and Wynne entered the tent.

"My dear, what in the Maker's name have you done?!" Asked the elder mage. "You _conscripted_ _a blood mage into the Grey Wardens?! _That is truly not wise. How do you know he can be trusted?"

"I know Jowan. He has a good heart. He just made some mistakes and now he has a chance to redeem himself. What's the matter with that?" Maeve replied.

"Nothing, my dear. Your intentions are noble, in fact. But what about his?" Wynne's expression softened as she spoke of Maeve's intentions, but she still looked concerned.

"Jowan wants to make things right as much as I do. I followed my gut, and my heart." The Warden answered softly but surely.

"And if you're wrong? If he betrays you?" Wynne questioned.

"Then I will decide his fate. But he needs to have a chance. The Chantry certainly won't give him one." Maeve crossed her arms and looked at Jowan, who had begun to stir.

"Where am I? Was it all a dream? Are the creatures of the Fade taunting me?" Jowan muttered softly as his eyes opened. He tried to get up and his grey eyes widened as Maeve pushed him back down again, a gentle hand on his chest.

"Relax, Jowan. You've been through a lot. You need to rest." She said to him, her voiced calm and soothing.

"_So it was real._" Jowan sighed and lay back down on the bedroll. Maeve smiled at him warmly, her expression was soft and kind.

"Yes. Try to stay still. In a few minutes Wynne and I will examine and heal any wounds you have." Maeve relaxed too and stepped back a bit from him. Then he saw that they weren't alone in the tent, which was only a little bit bigger than the cell he'd been confined to at Redcliffe.

He shuddered, and Leliana smiled assuringly at him, and Wynne gave him a small nod.

"Hello, Jowan." Leliana said softly as she helped Wynne prepare bandages, and various potions and salves.

He relaxed a little and Wynne and Maeve knelt at his side while Leliana stood by, ready to help.

"You will need to take off your robes. We'll give you better ones anyway. You'll need to be better protected than you are now." Maeve said.

Jowan began to remove what was left of his apprentice robes, slowly and carefully to avoid too much contact with his injuries. He left only a thin, plain white undershirt which was covered in dirt and even more blood, and a pair of trousers. Once his old robes were off he asked, "Can you not just mend the tears in my old ones?"

Maeve looked to Wynne for this answer and the older mage shook her head. "They're too far gone. We'll give you warm clothes after we have tended to your injuries, and next time we get a chance we can get you some new robes. Maeve is right, you will need to be better protected."

"From what, exactly?" Jowan asked nervously as he took off his undershirt and tossed it lightly to the side.

Maeve frowned. "Protection from the elements, preferably something with padding, like the armor a rogue wears."

"You mean I will be fighting, Maeve?" he asked with a hint of panic in his tone.

"Not for a while. You'll have to fully recover and I'll have to train you so we can count on you on the battlefield, but yes, eventually." Maeve said.

Jowan shuddered. "Darkspawn?"

"Mostly. I'll ask Alistair if we can spare you the Joining. We don't even know how to perform the ritual, so we'd need to wait until after the Blight is over. I conscripted you, but I'd like to avoid putting you through the Joining if it is possible." Maeve's voice faltered as Jowan went pale.

"_Putting me through it?_" he asked. Maeve didn't answer. Instead she put a hand on his arm and sort of stroked it, expressing her tenderness for him in the only way she felt she could, for no words would come. She was about to start crying again, but then Wynne spoke, distracting her from her troubled thoughts, for the moment at least.

"They really did a number, his wounds will need to be cleaned. The bigger ones I can heal, but we should bandage the smaller ones so we don't use up too much mana. We need not exhaust our supply of Lyrium potions by using so much healing magic. Especially since most of these injuries aren't too serious, even if they are painful. I am worried about that cut though. I will tend to it first."

Maeve nodded. She wanted to ease Jowan's pain as well as comfort him, but she knew the older mage would do her best and use good judgment, even if the dark-haired mage wasn't Wynne's favorite person in the world. Wynne began to clean the large gash on the side of his torso by scrubbing a piece of clean cloth soaked in water, which had been mixed with salve. Jowan winced at her touch, even though it was fairly gentle. Maeve moved her hand gently down Jowan's arm and took his hand. He squeezed her small hand as their fingers intertwined.

He cried out when Wynne began to clean the wound more vigorously. "It must be clean or it will fester and you'll be even worse off!" The old lady raised her voice sternly over Jowan's cries.

When the largest of the wounds was clean, Wynne started to cast a healing spell to close it. He looked to Maeve and she smiled at him, trying to be a source of strength for him, even though she wanted to break down and cry from seeing her childhood friend and constant companion so broken.

"You'll be all right, Jowan, Wynne knows what she's doing…" She said, smiling weakly. When Wynne released the spell it slowly but surely mended his broken flesh. Both of the younger mages watched as the gaping wound transformed into a faint scar. Wynne finished the spell and Jowan relaxed his tense muscles.

Wynne was pale now, and breathing heavily. She patted Jowan's shoulder. "There. The worst is over, lad, I promise."

"Thank you, Wynne…are you all right? You look pale…" He said softly.

Maeve felt some ease as she realized this was a little bit of the old Jowan she knew and loved shining through. _He always cared for others, putting them before himself. _The Warden smiled warmly at both of them. Wynne nodded to Jowan, but Maeve's smile faded as she realized just how pale Wynne was after casting the healing spell.

"I can carry on from here, Wynne. Get some rest." She told the elder mage.

"All right. I will be here if you need me. Those little cuts and bruises you can put some salve on. Then give him an elfroot potion for the pain and to help the wounds heal faster. Oh, yes, and don't forget to wrap the wound I just healed with some bandages," Wynne instructed. "That won't do much, but it will keep the area clean and remind him not to move too much; the flesh is still sensitive enough that it can reopen."

Then with a swift nod, Maeve let go of Jowan's hand and began rubbing some salve on a bruise on his shoulder. There were various cuts and bruises along with a large burn on the opposite side of his mid-section from the gash. When she got a closer look at it Maeve couldn't take it anymore. The tears started flowing down her cheeks and Jowan saw them.

"Maeve…" he began, not really sure what to say.

"How could they do this to you, Jowan? I should have been there to protect you! I should have left with you-"

"But then where would either of us be? We'd both be dead, or running, and neither of us would have a chance to make things right. That's no life I would ever wish on you."

Maeve's expression softened, and their eyes met. "I didn't even think about that…"

"The glass is half full, Maeve, not half empty!" Then he sat up, and before he remembered that they weren't alone, he put his arms around her in an embrace, and then she brought her lips to his and they kissed passionately.

Wynne's jaw dropped, her aged features showing a great deal of shock, and Leliana looked equally surprised. As Jowan pulled away and laid back down, Maeve looked at the others, her cheeks a rosy red color. She hadn't been expecting that, and her reaction had come from her heart rather than her head, so she wasn't sure if it had been too soon. Jowan sighed heavily and Maeve smiled nervously. "When all is said and done," Jowan said shakily, "I'm glad things turned out the way they did."

"I…I am too, Jowan." Maeve said softly, passing him the healing potion, which he took and drank gratefully.

Then Maeve wrapped Jowan's largest wound with the bandages Wynne had laid aside. "I'm going to heal that burn." She said, quiet determination in her tone.

Jowan nodded and he watched as Maeve's talented hands repaired the damage to his flesh. He leaned ever-so-slightly into her touch without realizing it. Maeve noticed, but she said nothing as a small smile tugged at her lips. Wynne went out to the campfire where the others were. Once Jowan's wounds were all tended to, Maeve asked Leliana, "Can you go and ask Alistair for a spare shirt?"

With a nod, the bard was gone for a few minutes. It had been quite a while since the Wardens and their companions had left Redcliffe, and the sun was beginning to set. When Leliana returned she handed Jowan a light sweater. "This was all he had, and it will be cold tonight." She said kindly as Jowan took the sweater and put it on.

"Thank you. You're…Leliana, right?" he looked the bard in the eyes.

Leliana smiled kindly and nodded. Morrigan entered the tent as Leliana left to go join the others at the campfire.

"Supper is nearly ready, Maeve, if you are quite finished tending to your friend's injuries." The black-clad apostate said.

Maeve nodded to Morrigan and turned to Jowan. She took his hand gently, and smiled. "Shall we?" she asked.

He looked down at their hands with a timid smile, knowing that their joined hands meant more that friendship now.

"Yes, let's go." He said, smiling a little less timidly. Then she helped him up and they slowly made their way outside.


End file.
